Leadership »

Sep 03

What is the Difference Between a SIGN and a TEST?

By Ryan Avery Food for thought, Leadership, Motivation, Personal Growth, Self-Improvement No Comments

The difference between perceiving something as a “sign” that we shouldn’t proceed versus interpreting it as a “test” we should overcome lies primarily in our interpretation of events, mindset, and approach to the challenge. Here’s is the breakdown of these two concepts and would love to hear more about what you feel the difference is between these two…

Understanding “Signs”

I feel like seeing some event or obstacle as a sign implies that we believe external forces or circumstances are indicating that we should stop, change direction, or reconsider our current path. This interpretation can often stem from intuition, personal beliefs, or past experiences. Characteristics of seeing something as a sign:

Intuitive Guidance: We rely on our gut feeling or belief system to interpret events as indicators of what we should or shouldn’t do.
Preventative Action: Seeing something as a sign often leads to avoidance or cessation to prevent potential negative outcomes.
External Focus: Emphasis is placed on external events or coincidences as messages or warnings.

Example: If we are planning a trip and suddenly encounter numerous obstacles like canceled flights, lost reservations, or sudden illness, we might interpret these as signs that we shouldn’t go on the trip.

Understanding “Tests”

When we perceive an event or obstacle as a test it means we view challenges as opportunities to prove resilience, determination, and commitment. This perspective is often associated with personal growth and achieving goals despite difficulties and what I typically look a things as in my personal and professional life. Characteristics:

Growth Mindset: Challenges are seen as a normal part of any worthwhile endeavor and are embraced as learning experiences.
Persistence: We are motivated to overcome obstacles, believing that success lies beyond the difficulties.
Internal Focus: Emphasis is placed on our own abilities and determination to navigate through challenges.

Example: Using the same travel scenario, encountering obstacles like canceled flights might be seen as tests of your adaptability and determination to proceed with our plans despite setbacks because we really want to go to that location/vacation we have in our mind.

Determining the Appropriate Interpretation

Deciding whether to view an obstacle as a sign or a test depends on several factors for me:

Context: Consider the situation’s specifics and whether the obstacles are insurmountable or typical challenges.
Goals and Values: Reflect on how important the goal is and whether persisting aligns with our personal values and long-term objectives.
Patterns: Look for recurring patterns. A single obstacle might be a test, but persistent and escalating issues could be interpreted as signs.
Intuition vs. Rationality: Balance our gut feelings with logical assessment of the situation.
Advice and Perspective: Sometimes seeking external perspectives from trusted individuals can provide clarity.

Example Decision-Making: If pursuing a business venture, initial hurdles like funding issues could be normal tests of entrepreneurship. However, if serious legal problems or ethical concerns arise, these might be signs to reconsider or adjust our approach.

Blending Both Perspectives

It’s also possible to integrate both interpretations:

Adaptive Approach: Start by viewing challenges as tests, but remain open to interpreting persistent or severe obstacles as signs to adjust your path.
Reflective Practice: Regularly assess progress and obstacles, reflecting on whether to persist or pivot based on new information and experiences.

Understanding the difference between signs and tests can help us navigate life’s challenges more effectively. By carefully evaluating situations and reflecting on our responses, we can make informed decisions that align with our goals and well-being. What are your thoughts? Is this blog post a sign or a test you should do something about what you have been thinking about? 🙂

Aug 26

Love0

Changing vs. Transforming: Why It Matters to Us as Leaders

By Ryan Avery Business, Communication, Leadership, Motivation, Personal Growth, Self-Improvement No Comments

Changing vs. Transforming: Why It Matters to Us as Leaders

I am in Boston this week keynoting. This past month has been my third best month financially in my company’s 12 years doing business. After my wife shared some insight from this mediation expert, Davidji, it got me thinking about all the change and transformations that have happened over the last decade and I couldn’t stop thinking about those two words, change & transformation. As leaders, we often find ourselves at the crossroads of change and transformation. Both are vital to our growth and success, yet they serve different purposes and lead to distinct outcomes. Understanding the difference between these two concepts can profoundly impact how we lead our teams, shape our strategies, and ultimately, achieve our goals.

The Nature of Change

Change is about making adjustments. It’s when we tweak a process, revise a strategy, or alter a behavior to adapt to new circumstances. Change is often reactive, driven by external pressures or the need to address immediate challenges. For instance, when we introduce a new tool to improve productivity or adjust our management style to better align with team dynamics, we are implementing change.

Change is essential because it allows us to stay relevant and responsive in a fast-paced world. However, change often operates on the surface level. It’s like rearranging the furniture in a room—while it may create a fresh environment, the fundamental structure remains the same. Change is necessary, but it can be limited in scope, offering incremental improvements rather than revolutionary shifts.

The Power of Transformation

Transformation, on the other hand, is about the complete shift in our approach, mindset, or identity. It’s this deeper, more profound process that fundamentally alters how we operate, think, and lead. Transformation is not simply about doing things differently; it’s about becoming different.

As leaders, transformation requires us to challenge our assumptions, embrace new paradigms, and be willing to step into the unknown. It’s about reimagining our leadership style, our organizational culture, and even our vision for the future. Transformation is proactive, driven by a desire to achieve higher purpose or to create lasting impact.

While change might involve adopting a new communication tool, transformation could mean redefining how we communicate altogether, fostering the culture of transparency and collaboration that permeates every level of the organization. Transformation is like remodeling a house—it changes the structure, the layout, and the very essence of the space, creating something entirely new.

Why It Matters to Us as Leaders

The distinction between change and transformation is crucial for us as leaders because it influences how we approach our roles and responsibilities. Here’s why it matters:

Depth of Impact: Change can solve immediate problems, but transformation creates long-lasting solutions. By focusing on transformation, we ensure that the changes we implement are sustainable and deeply rooted in our organization’s values and vision.
Resilience and Adaptability: In today’s volatile business environment, being able to adapt is essential. However, true resilience comes from transformation. When we transform, we build the foundation that allows us to thrive in the face of adversity, rather than simply survive.
Empowering Our Teams: As leaders, our goal is not simply to manage but to motivate/inspire and empower our teams. Transformation invites us to lead by example, showing our teams that growth is not solely about small changes but about embracing new ways of thinking and being. This, in turn, encourages them to pursue their own transformations.
Visionary Leadership: Change is often tactical, focusing on immediate needs. Transformation, however, is strategic and visionary. It pushes us to look beyond the present and envision the future that is radically different and better. By embracing transformation, we position ourselves as leaders who are not all about being reactive but are shaping the future.

As we navigate our leadership journeys, we must recognize when change is necessary and when transformation is required. Both are valuable, and transformation holds the key to creating a lasting impact and leading our organizations into the future with strength and purpose. Let’s challenge ourselves to go beyond mere adjustments and strive for profound, meaningful transformations that redefine what’s possible for us and those we lead.

Aug 12

Love0

Why How We Feel Matters More Than How We Look

By Ryan Avery Leadership, Motivation No Comments

In our world where appearance often can takes center stage, it’s easy to get caught up in the quest for the perfect look. Social media is flooded with images of seemingly flawless people, leading many to equate our worth with physical appearance. However, I believe while looking good might bring temporary validation, it’s how we feel that truly impacts our lives in meaningful, lasting ways.

The Trap of Appearance

Most of us have heard the saying, “You never get a second chance to make a first impression.” It’s true that how we present ourselves can influence how others perceive us. However, placing too much emphasis on outward appearance can lead to a superficial existence. When we focus solely on how we look, we might neglect deeper aspects of our well-being, such as emotional health, mental clarity, and self-worth. This can create a disconnect between our external image and our internal state, leading to feelings of inadequacy, anxiety, and even depression.

Moreover, the pressure to maintain a certain appearance can be exhausting. It’s a moving target—what’s considered attractive today might change tomorrow. Trends come and go, and trying to keep up can be overwhelming. This constant pursuit can distract us from what truly matters: how we feel inside.

The Power of Feeling Good

How we feel is the direct reflection of our inner state and our internal dialouge. When we prioritize our feelings, we’re tuning in to what our body, mind, and spirit need. This self-awareness allows us to make choices that align with our true selves, leading to greater fulfillment and happiness.

Feeling good isn’t simply about being happy all the time; it’s about being in touch with our emotions and understanding what they’re telling us. When we feel stressed, our body is signaling that something is off balance. When we feel energized, it’s the sign that we’re on the right path. By paying attention to these cues, we can make adjustments that improve our overall well-being.

Why Focusing on Feelings Leads to Better Results

Sustainable Health: When we focus on how we feel, we make choices that support our long-term health. Rather than following a restrictive diet simply to fit into a certain size, we choose nourishing foods that make us feel energized and vibrant. Instead of punishing ourselves with grueling workouts, we find physical activities that we enjoy and that leave us feeling strong and capable. I have been known to do this with things like The Whole 30 or P90X. Now I am focused on what best nourishes my body while doing activities I enjoy and move my body at the same time like paragliding and swimming.
Authentic Confidence: True confidence comes from within. It’s not about looking a certain way but feeling good about who we are. When we prioritize our feelings, we build the strong sense of self-worth that isn’t dependent on external validation. This authentic confidence allows us to navigate life’s challenges with resilience and grace.
Better Relationships: How we feel affects how we relate to others. When we’re in tune with our emotions, we can communicate more effectively and build deeper, more meaningful connections. By focusing on our inner state, we become better partners, friends, and colleagues.
Greater Success: Success is often seen as the result of hard work and perseverance, but it’s also about feeling good in the process. When we’re aligned with our true selves, we’re more motivated, creative, and productive. This leads to better outcomes in all areas of life, from our careers to our personal goals.

How to Shift the Focus from Looks to Feelings

Practice Mindfulness: Take time each day to check in with yourself. How do we feel physically, emotionally, and mentally? This awareness is the first step in making choices that support our well-being. Trying looking in the mirror today and saying nice things about yourself and to yourself! I have been doing this lately and it has been working really well for me!
Set Intentions Based on Feelings: Instead of setting goals based on appearance, set intentions based on how you want to feel. For example, aim to feel more energized, peaceful, or fulfilled. Let these intentions guide your actions.
Surround Yourself with Supportive People: Spend time with those who value you for who you are, not simply how you look. Positive relationships can reinforce the importance of inner well-being. Remember, “because they were your friend, does not mean they have to be your friend!”
Embrace Self-Care: Make self-care a priority. Whether it’s through meditation, exercise, or simply taking time to relax, self-care practices help you feel your best, both inside and out.Remember, “Self-care is not selfish!”

While it’s natural to care about how we look, it’s how we feel that truly shapes our lives. By prioritizing our feelings, we create a foundation of well-being that supports sustainable health, authentic confidence, better relationships, and greater success. In the end, feeling good is more than a goal—it’s the key to living the fulfilling, meaningful life we want. So, the next time we catch ourselves worrying about our appearance, take a moment to check in with how we feel. That’s where the real magic happens. Keep being THE!

Aug 06

Love0

The Difference Between Being Interested and Being Invested

By Ryan Avery Leadership, Motivation No Comments

The Difference Between Being Interested and Being Invested

In our fast-paced world, it’s easy to find ourselves interested in a multitude of things. We might have hobbies, aspirations, and casual pursuits that capture our attention for a while. But there’s difference between being interested in something and being invested in it. This distinction can shape our personal and professional lives in significant ways.

Interest: The Spark of Curiosity

Interest is often the initial spark of curiosity. It’s the feeling we get when something catches our eye and we think, “That’s cool” or “I’d like to know more about that.” Interest is:

Casual: Interest is often casual and doesn’t require a deep commitment. We can be interested in many things simultaneously without dedicating substantial time or resources to them.
Flexible: Our interests can change quickly. One week we might be fascinated by photography, and the next, we are diving into the world of cooking.
Low Stakes: Being interested in something doesn’t carry significant consequences. If our interest wanes, there’s little lost.

Interest is crucial because it’s the first step toward deeper engagement. It allows us to explore and discover what truly resonates with us. The thing that is important for us to remember, for those things that matter most, interest alone isn’t enough.

Investment: The Commitment to Growth

Investment, on the other hand, goes beyond mere curiosity. It involves deliberate and sustained commitment to growth and improvement. Being invested in something means:

Time and Effort: Investment requires dedicating significant time and effort. It’s not simply about dabbling; it’s about immersing yourself fully.
Consistency: Unlike interest, which can be fleeting, investment requires consistency. It’s about showing up regularly, even when it’s challenging.
Resources: Investment often involves allocating resources, whether it’s money, energy, or emotional bandwidth. We are willing to make sacrifices for the sake of our commitment.
Long-Term Perspective: Being invested means we are in it for the long haul. We are not simply looking for immediate gratification rather are focused on long-term rewards and growth.

Why the Difference Matters

Understanding the difference between interest and investment can have a profound impact on our life and goals. Here’s why:

Goal Achievement: Many of our most significant achievements require investment, interest is not enough. Whether it’s building the successful career, cultivating that meaningful relationship, or mastering one skill, investment is key to reaching our goals.
Personal Fulfillment: True fulfillment often comes from those areas where we are deeply invested. I personally believe that the sense of accomplishment and growth from long-term dedication is far more rewarding than the temporary pleasure of casual interest.
Impact: When we are invested, our actions have greater impact. In professional settings, being invested can lead to leadership roles, higher levels of success, and more significant contributions to our field.

Turning Interest into Investment

So how do we turn an interest into investment? Here are a few steps:

Identify What Matters: Reflect on our interests and identify which ones resonate most deeply. These are the areas where investment might be worthwhile.
Set Clear Goals: Define what we want to achieve. Clear, actionable goals can help transform a casual interest into one committed investment.
Allocate Resources: Be willing to dedicate the necessary time, effort, and resources. This might mean scheduling regular practice sessions, seeking out mentors, or investing in quality tools and materials.
Stay Consistent: Consistency is key. Even when motivation wanes, stick with it. The rewards of investment come with time and sustained effort.
Embrace Challenges: Understand that investment involves overcoming obstacles. Embrace challenges as opportunities for growth rather than setbacks.

While interest is a valuable starting point, investment is what drives true growth and achievement. By understanding the difference and committing to the areas that matter most, we can turn our interests into investments that shape the more fulfilling and impactful life we want. Whether it’s in our personal or professional endeavors, being invested will always take us further than just being interested. What are your thoughts?

Jul 28

Love0

Perception vs Impact

By Ryan Avery Motivation No Comments

This week I am keynoting in Anaheim, CA at ASHE and had an interesting question be asked that made me want to do some deeper research, ask a few more questions myself and ultimately see how I could do a better job with my answer for them. What is the difference between perception and impact?

For example, if we do something or say something, is there a difference in how things are perceived vs how things are impacted? Ultimately, and I was wrong at first, I do believe there is difference in the two. These concepts are really important in understanding interpersonal communication and relationships, especially in our role as leaders. So here are some thoughts on their similarities and differences:

Perception

Definition: Perception is the way something is understood or interpreted by an individual. It’s how someone sees, hears, or otherwise becomes aware of something through their senses.

Factors Influencing Perception:

Past Experiences: Personal history can color how one perceives new information.
Cultural Background: Cultural norms and values can shape one’s perception.
Emotions: Current emotional state can influence how someone interprets information.
Cognitive Biases: Preexisting beliefs and biases affect perception.

Example: If we give constructive feedback to one of our clients, their perception of our feedback can be influenced by their past experiences with criticism, their emotional state at that moment, and their trust in us as their leader.

Impact

Definition: Impact is the actual effect or outcome that an action or communication has on someone. It is the tangible or intangible result of the interaction.

Factors Influencing Impact:

Delivery: The manner in which something is said or done (I call this tone, time and text, even body language) affects its impact.
Context: The situational context in which the interaction occurs can influence its impact.
Individual Differences: Personal characteristics, such as resilience or sensitivity, play a role in how an action affects someone.
Relationships: The existing relationship between individuals can modify the impact of an action or statement.

Example: The same piece of constructive feedback might have different impacts on different clients. One client might feel motivated to improve, while another might feel discouraged or criticized.

Similarities

Interpersonal Dynamics: Both perception and impact are central to how individuals interact and communicate with each other.
Subjectivity: Both are influenced by subjective factors, such as emotions, past experiences, and personal biases.
Interdependence: Perception often shapes the impact. How someone perceives an action or statement influences how it impacts them.

Differences

Nature:
- Perception: Internal, subjective interpretation.
- Impact: External, actual effect or outcome.
Focus:
- Perception: Focuses on the receiver’s interpretation.
- Impact: Focuses on the outcome of the interaction.
Measurement:
- Perception: Harder to measure directly, as it’s internal and personal.
- Impact: Can be observed and measured through outcomes and changes in behavior or feelings.

Why They Matter in Leadership

Understanding the difference between perception and impact is essential for us as leaders because:

Communication Effectiveness: Knowing that perception can vary widely helps you tailor our communication to minimize misunderstandings and maximize positive impact.
Feedback Sensitivity: Awareness of the potential different impacts of our feedback can help us deliver it in ways that is constructive and supportive.
Building Trust: Acknowledging and addressing the differences between perception and impact can strengthen relationships by showing empathy and understanding.

By being mindful of both perception and impact, we can enhance our leadership abilities and foster more effective and meaningful interactions with our teams, families, friends and even people who disagree with us!

Dec 06

Love0

The 2020 Photo Challenge

By Ryan Avery Communication, Family & Personal Life, Motivation No Comments

Every year my family and I select the number of photos that correlate with the last two numbers of the year. This year we will select 20 (for 2020). Last year we selected 19 (for 2019) and so on.

We select the photos from our cameras that best represent the year for us and we share them with each other. This is a very fun and eye-opening experience to see what your year was all about and hear from your family about how they saw the same year.

My challenge to you starting this week is to select the 20 photos that best represent your 2020 and share them with your family and friends.

Ready… set… go!

Oct 25

Love0

Get Creative

By Ryan Avery Communication, Videos No Comments

This week I had to be creative while being on the road and in a hotel room to deliver one of my virtual presentations. Here is the set up!

My challenge for us this week is to get creative the next time something comes our way that we are not used to or puts us in a different environment.

Where can we get creative this week? Ready… set… go!

Oct 18

Love0

How to Get Ready for A Virtual Meeting

By Ryan Avery Communication, Leadership No Comments

I have 17 virtual keynotes this month and more than a dozen coaching sessions.
I had one client ask me how I get ready and prepare for all my virtual meetings and thought I would share it with all of us this week.

We use the acronym C.L.A.P. to get ready for our virtual meetings:
CONTENT – Do I have the content I need in front of me for this specific meeting?
LIGHTING – Is my lighting what I want it to be?
AUDIO – Is my audio working correctly?
POSITION – What is the angle of my camera and does my background represent me personally and professionally?

This allows us to stay ready, present ourselves that best represents us and our company, and allows us to connect with those we are speaking to online. Remember, “How we are perceived, dictates what we receive!”

Make sure to use C.L.A.P. for your next virtual meeting this week and see how you feel different online.
For those who want it, here is the infographic you can share with your team.
Have the best week and remember to always be THE!

Oct 04

Love0

Because It Offends You Does Not Mean…

By Ryan Avery Communication, Family & Personal Life, Leadership, Motivation No Comments

Here are my notes this week about being offended and what we can do when we are offended!

Sep 27

Love0

Why Should We Have A Routine?

By Ryan Avery Family & Personal Life, Leadership No Comments

Why should we have a routine?

This week I looked into what differentiates A leader vs THE leader when it comes to routine and why routines matter so much to us!

This week’s notes come from taking a look at Ryan Holiday’s Ego is The Enemy, research from various publications and listening to friends who cheer us along the way!

Action Items of the week: #1 Think about who you want to be vs what you want to do and #2 Come up your routine around the PPP.

Sep 20

Love0

What Happens When We Don’t Give 100%

By Ryan Avery Adventure, Leadership No Comments

For the past year I have been working to get my P2 Pilots license for paragliding. There are so many parallels between paragliding and leadership and one hit me hard this week when my coach says, “When you jump off this cliff, if you don’t give 100% you will hurt yourself!”

Running full speed ahead off a mountain when your entire body is screaming NO but your mind is saying YES is a wild thing! We have taken all the precautions, steps and have we have our contingency plan in place. But why can it be so hard to jump, when we know it is safe?

What really happens if we don’t give 100% when we are going for our goals? Where are we not giving 100% and is it hurting us? Where is one place we can step up to give 100% this week? Watch how you start to fly when you give 100%!

1 2 Next