This week I have been on ten planes. I like to travel and every time we take off, I still enjoy the thrill of flying and being 30,000+ feet in the air!
However, whether you travel a little or a lot or whether you like planes or not, there are certain people that are horrible to sit next to.
These are the five worst types of people to sit next to on a plane and how to deal with them (yes, I have experienced them all):
The Bloody Nose
I am ready for my three-hour flight to the East Coast and as the first wheel leaves the ground, the guy’s nose next to me turns on like a bloody faucet. His blood starts splashing all over his shirt, legs and no one has a napkin! I am freaking out because I can’t stand blood but also trying not to make this guy feel embarrassed. This is the worst of them all for me!
How to deal with it: ALWAYS carry a napkin with you. Now in my computer bag, I have several napkins just in case this ever happens again I can assist the person sitting next to me and avoid any blood splatter on my pants!
The Electric Shaver
As I close my eyes to try to get some sleep during my red-eye flight, I hear that familiar “buzzzzzz” go right next to me and see my good ol’ seatmate is shaving his scruff on the plane! Are you serious? I kept finding little black hairs on my pants the entire trip! Not cool man, not cool.
How to deal with it: I wish I could tell you I said something, but truthfully I was so shocked and was processing what this guy was thinking that I couldn’t say anything. I literally was speechless. Next time this happens however, I will be ready to politely ask the man (or hairy lady) to wait to do that in the bathroom because I don’t wont their little hairs all over my bag and pants!
The Horrible Breath
I can take bad breath sometimes but not the constant flow of it in my face from the energetic person who wants to tell you their entire life story in two-hours. When you are sitting on a plane, you are pretty close to each other. Make sure you check your breath every now and again!
How to deal with it: Have a variety of mints and gum with you to offer them. Make it look like you want a piece first. I pop one into my mouth and then ask “would you like some gum or a mint?” this has worked 90% of the time because most people don’t like to say no and they enjoy the satisfaction of scoring a free piece of candy!
The One With BO
Oh you know what I am talking about. The one who you can smell two seats up and the one who smells like they shower using man sweat, sock juice and small bits of sewer water! The one who you try to avoid at all cost because you don’t want to get a headache from their bad odor body fumes!
How to deal with it: If it is a long flight and there are open seats, I asked to be moved. This might sound rude or mean, but this one I don’t deal with. I didn’t spend hundreds of dollars to sit next to someone who smells like they just worked out and rolled around in dirty laundry. Make sure to do it politely and go back to tell the flight attendant what is going on.
The Sick One
Whether they are throwing up their stomach or have a contagious cold, sick people should not be allowed on the plane. I am serious. You are risking infecting everyone else! If you know you are sick AND contagious, please don’t fly!
How to deal with it: Repeat the “How to” step under “The One with BO” plus make sure to carry a packet of E-mergency, travel sized Purell and wash your hands immediately when you step off the plane.
These are the five worst people that I have sat next to on the plane. What is your least favorite and are there other types of people I am forgetting? Let me know down in the comments below.
Enjoy your next flight and may you sit next to someone who does not have a bloody nose, already shaved before they got on the plane, who has minty fresh breath, smells well and is healthier than Popeye! As always…