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Jul 18

Why you should be more self-first!

By Ryan Avery Motivation 2 Comments

This isn’t a hard thing to grasp, “You can’t give what you don’t have!” yet why can it be so hard to remember at times?

If you don’t have energy, you can’t give energy.
If you don’t love yourself, it will be difficult to love others.
You can’t teach what you haven’t learned.

So…

Are you sacrificing sleep and not eating healthy in an effort to get more done?
Are you hard on yourself when things go wrong or you make a mistake?

Are you digesting enough new information on a regular basis to stretch yourself?

It is time to be more self-first so you can give more to those who need it most!

The past month I have been going so fast I forgot to take care of myself and those important relationships. I have worked out irregularly. I have been teaching more than I have been learning. I have not done as many “fun/non-work related” things as I have liked.

I have been so focused on the success of my businesses and helping others, I forgot to take care of the most important person, me! In a society where we can look down on those who are selfish, it can be hard to rationalize giving more to ourselves so we should redefine it as self-first (as my wife likes to say). The more you give to yourself, the more you can give to others!

But if we are serious about changing the world, helping others and making a difference then we have to start with us! So while we continue to do the 31 Days of Kindness Challenge, I want to encourage you to look at how you are being kind to yourself. What are you doing to be happy, have more energy and love yourself?

Should you go on a walk right now, set your phone down and look around outside?
Could you write down three things you have accomplished in the past three years that make you feel proud?
Can you take 30 minutes tonight to spend time with someone you love where you can laugh, play cards and have fun?

Yesterday I sat under a tree looking out at the water for a couple hours, read and enjoyed the sun. I slept in today, playing tennis with a friend on Saturday and am getting to work at a normal time. I learned from an old boss, “There will always be work to do, so learn to to be ok with never being finished, but always be hungry to do more.”

So you should be more self-first because the more you give yourself, the more you can give others and we can all benefit from what you can have to offer! As always…

Dream BIG,
Ryan

“Everybody wants to change the world. Nobody wants to change themselves.” ~Leo Tolstoy

Jul 16

Love0

What’s the best investment to make in today’s economy?

By Ryan Avery Motivation, Productivity 9 Comments

Today’s question comes from Indira Berikova from Alma-Ata, Almaty, Kazakhstan, when she wants to know “What is the best investment in the market right now?”

I have a good grasp on money management and taking care of our future as my wife and I are almost debt free, live below our means and give 10% of our income away to good causes.

That was not always the case.

Have you ever been so broke you had to water down your soap and struggle to find rent money? A couple years ago, Chelsea and I had to water down our watered down soap. We had $84 in our bank account, had no idea where rent money was coming from and almost got on food stamps.

I applied for 75+ jobs with no response (even Quiznos didn’t hire me!). I remember laying on our carpeted floor, not knowing what we were going to do. We walked outside to clear our minds and the phone rang. I got a job! An awesome job! They even paid me an advance so we could stay in our apartment and slowly get back on our feet.

I don’t like being crunched for cash. It’s not fun going to the grocery store and not being able to get the types of food you want. It’s not fun when you have friends who go out and you can’t join them because you can’t even afford one happy hour beer. It’s not fun to not be able to buy your wife a $2 flower to show her you love her because that’s not “in the budget.” I never wanted to be in that situation again!

Once we got that light of hope with a job offer, we did everything we could to advance our personal and professional career. We started reading, digesting, learning and taking in as much information as we could about life, success, money, happiness, family, goal setting and travel.

We agreed to always live below our means, take care of the things we care about most by sticking to our four pillars and to have a successful life. Four years later, we still live by these principles and it has helped us have a life we feel proud to live.

So I am not a financial advisor, I dabble with my E-Trade account by buying stocks and selling options and right now most of the money we make goes right back into our companies, but the best investment you can make in today’s economy, without a doubt, is yourself!

Invest in you! Read more books. Watch more educational videos. Listen to motivational CDs. Go workout and take alone time. Create goals. Stretch yourself. Do what it takes to make things happen in your life! When you invest in yourself, others will invest in you.

What are you doing right now, today, so that tomorrow you are stronger, better, more efficient and more successful than you were two days ago? Invest in yourself and not only will your family be stronger, our world will be better!

Keep investing in yourself and it will pay dividends for years to come. Thanks for the question Indira and as always…

Dream BIG,
Ryan

P.S. My goal is to help you reach yours. I will be honest, open and share valuable content that will help improve areas of your life. If you like my content, sign up to receive articles in the right hand corner of this page. Thank you and keep working to make things happen!

Jul 10

Love2

How to get over the past and focus on the future!

By Ryan Avery Motivation, Uncategorized 6 Comments

This post comes from Stephani Morris from Brooklyn, MI when she asked, “How do you get over the past and focus on the future?”

Whether your past is a good thing or bad, it can hold you back if you dwell on it for too long. I know people who won awesome awards and they never did anything after because they glued themselves to that one accomplishment. I know people who have life stories similar to the ones you see in a Lifetime movie and they stay so bitter because of their past that they can’t move on.

Let your past be stepping stones to your next success – not an anchor in which you think you have to stay (tweet). It’s time to get over the past, no matter how good or bad, and start focusing on the future.

You should be happy you have experienced the good, the bad and the ugly! As a leader, your past helps you relate and connect to more people and it helps you make decisions today that will dictate your future!

Ways you can get over the past and focus on the future:

Set up your vision board!
Get those scissors out, those old magazines you have thrown in the corner and set up a vision board of what you want your life to look like. This will help keep you focused and a visual reminder we can have what we want in life.

Ask yourself if you are being insane?
The definition of insane according to Albert Einstein is “Doing the same thing over and expecting different results.” Are you doing the same things to try and get over the past? Are you doing the same things that are keeping you stuck where you have been? What is something else you can try today to get you focused on the future and remind yourself to let it go (insert Disney theme song here).

Drop the negative people in your life!
You become who you surround yourself by. If you are around negative people, you too will be negative. If you surround yourself with those who are focused on the past… guess what? You too will do the same. It’s time to find people who are ambitious, respect their past but look to find ways to improve their future. Who can you get rid of in your life who is holding you back? Sounds brutal, but you know who they are!

Focus on yourself first!
Sounds selfish? Good, it should! Until you take care of yourself, you can’t take care of anyone else. I see so many people trying to help others yet they forget about their own well-being. What does the flight attendant tell you to do with your oxygen mask if the plane is going down? Put yours on first THEN help those next to you! The world is no good if you are no good so start focusing on yourself and how you can be stronger and get your mind focused on moving forward!

Find three quotes you like!
If you are focused too much on the past, open another tab in your browser and type “inspirational quotes” into Google. Find them, print them out and keep them around your house, car, office or bathroom to constantly remind yourself you have what it takes. Keep your eyes forward and focus on the future.

Three of my favorite quotes to keep me going:
“Whether you think you can, or you can’t, you are right.” – Henry Ford
“Do you want to know who you are? Don’t Ask. Act!” – Thomas Jefferson
” Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever.” – Mahatma Gandhi

Write down three good things that have come out of your past!
What good things have come from your past? Take three minutes right now and write these down. Tell yourself “parts of my past are good and now it is time to move on to bigger and better things because the world needs more of what I have to offer.” Don’t settle!

Make sure to take time today and if there is something in your past that has been holding you back, good or bad, start with setting up a vision board, finding three quotes you like and write down three good things that have come from your past that you are thankful for. This exercise might take 20 minutes of your day but will get you the boost you need as a leader to be proud of the past and focused on the future.

Thanks for the question Stephani. Let’s all keep using our voice to make a difference and as always…

Dream BIG,
Ryan

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Jul 03

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The Pros and Cons for Changing the Name of NSA

By Ryan Avery Leadership, Motivation 55 Comments

Many of you are speakers and this post will focus on the name change of a very important organization to our industry. For those who do not identify as a speaker, you will still take away important lessons of what to consider when making a big announcement.

I attended the 2014 National Speakers Association (NSA) Conference this week in San Diego for the first time. I joined NSA in July 2013 and have been looking forward to this event for almost a year. Filled with life-changing content, building blocks to life-long friendships and inspiration from the world’s greatest speakers, this week was an event that will be remembered for a lifetime!

The organization made a HUGE announcement during the conference and over the past several months the Board of Directors along with staff, special committee, hours of deliberating, surveys and questioning- the leadership team has decided to change the name of the National Speakers Association to Platform.

I have mixed feelings about this and don’t know why we needed a major name change overhaul like this (As I have heard, membership has been at an all-time high and we had a $100,000 surplus in our operating budget last year) but they said “the rate of change in recent years has outpaced the evolution of the organization, and it was clear we needed to make a number of changes to stay relevant as the premier association that serves the speaking profession.” Here are the pros and cons to changing the name of NSA:

Cons to changing the name of NSA

It is SO broad that it doesn’t tell people who we are.
I like the word “speaker.” I understand that others don’t identify as speakers as many of our members are entertainers, comedians, bloggers, authors, etc. and we are wanting to be more inclusive but there are many other organizations, associations for those people to join. This group is focused on speaking and using our voice to inspire, educate and entertain. Speakers first, blogger/author/comedian/etc. later. It is a disservice to Cavett Robert (Founder of NSA), our members and those we serve for not including a form of “speaker” in the name of our organization.

It sounds like an event, not a group!

I feel like I am going to Platform, not that I am part of Platform. It doesn’t tell me who I am or what I do. TED is an event. SXSW is an event. Sundance is an event. As I heard it explained, the Medial Doctors Association is not changing their name to Emergency Room, Plumbers Association of America are not change their name to Toilet and the Sailing Association of Australia is not changing their name to Ocean. Just because we speak from the platform, it does not need to be the name of our organization. I am afraid this word is trendy and what will it mean in 10 years?

What does this mean for everything else?
When they rolled out the name change on stage, they didn’t explain what else was changing. What about the website? What about the membership requirements to join? Where do we learn more about this and how can we get more information about how we incorporate this into our marketing?

Pros to changing the name of NSA

It will help grow our industry to include more professions.
The term “platform” allows other professionals to join our organization who do not feel they are speakers but rather thought leaders in a variety of mediums (blogging, vlogging, writing, entertainment, etc.). As much as I like the word speaker, I think it will grow the organization and attract new members around the world.

It is no longer a national organization but rather encompasses a global scale.
We should have changed it to Global Speakers Association with Platform being what our events were called and breakout sessions focused on platform specifics for speakers, bloggers, entertainers, comics, etc. But Platform is a more inclusive word than National, as we now have 20+ countries represented around the world. But again, why not Global Speakers Association?

The tagline is spot on!
Inform. Influence. Inspire. This, as an industry, is what we do and they did a wonderful job summarizing what value we add as speakers to those we serve with these three words. This will be a great way to help explain to others what I do for a living and that I am more than a public speaker, I am a problem solver.

Regardless of what you think about the name change, this involved a big announcement and a HUGE change to an organization who has more than 40 years of history. I commend the leadership team and Board for making this change and actually taking action to try and remain relevant. So the next time you are planning on making a big announcement at work, home or to your members, here are things to remember:

1) Remain professional and get insight from the world’s experts
2) Be prepared to answer questions and have staff trained and ready to answer FAQs
3) Have a place for people to get in touch to answer even more questions
4) Ask the right person to deliver the news to the group
5) Do a great job explaining “why” but also the “now what?”
6) Do your homework on what others inside and outside the organization think
7) Practice, Practice, Practice delivering the announcement beforehand

However, I don’t think associations are dead, I think the way we market them needs to improve and how we reach our target market could use some work. Because we are in over 20 countries now, I understand the need to change the word ‘National’ and would have like to have seen it be changed to The Global Speakers Association.

We are moving forward with Platform and it is an exciting time in the organization’s history as we plan to continue to serve thousands of people around the world each year with our messages, our ability to solve problems and add value to the masses.

QUESTION: I want to know what other (speakers and non-speakers) think about the new name change. Do you like the name Platform, why or why not? As speakers, let’s do what we do best and start talking and creating a conversation by posting our opinions below.

Jun 26

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How to write powerful headlines (BONUS: Easy to use formulas)

By Ryan Avery Leadership, Motivation 7 Comments

This article comes to you with request from Matt Maggio in Miami, FL.Matt reached out last week and gave insight in how to provide bloggers with information on how to write headlines so engaging anyone who sees it, will click to read it! He’s been studying copywriting and how the words you choose in your headlines makes all the difference!

He said consider three things when writing powerful headlines:

1) Focus on creating a “how-to” or “why” or “number (#) series” while adding value and/or providing entertainment elements. He says, “The how-to is very powerful because it engages the prospect on a deeper psychological level. It’s self-centered and most of us pay more attention when we hear how-to and whatever follows after it.”

2) Write for your audience in mind – Do you know who your audience is? Identify who your ideal reader is and ask them what they want to learn more about. I do this through my social media accounts all the time; last week I received 20 article ideas! My audience gives me direction for what they want to hear and who is paying attention to my articles.

3) Base it off your experience – Why are you the one to write this? For example, it might be strange if I wrote an article called “How to win a basketball game if you are under six feet tall.” Not only do I know nothing about basketball, my audience knows I don’t play the game and I can’t speak for those under six feet! Write about what you know with those in mind you want to reach!

Moving forward when you are writing an article for your blog or a chapter in your book, think of these formulas to catch your readers attention and get them to click on what you just wrote!

Powerful Headline Formulas include:

“How to (eliminate pain) (without more pain)”

“How to get (specific result) (in short amount of time) (with very little risk)”

“Why (common-sense approach) doesn’t work… and what to do about it).”

I can say first hand these have worked for me. Starting out blogging I would spend hours on one article and find very little engagement after I hit publish. Other articles I would spend five minutes writing and boom my stats soar for the day! Why? When I look back at the articles, the content nor my writing was better, what the main problem seemed to be was the title in which I used to grab the readers attention. People will not click to read your article if it does not click with what interests or grabs their attention!

What sounds more powerful and more intriguing to read?
How to get more clients without sounding to pushy? – OR – Lessons I learned from an encounter with a recent client!

If I used the same content for the body of the article and used those different titles I guarantee I would have a larger open rate on the “how-to” compared to the “lessons learned.” I mean which one would you most likely open? Plus, in the first one I have considered my focus, my audience and my experience!

Take Matt’s advice and start writing powerful headlines so your writing gets into the hands of more people. Your stories, message and insight matter and if you are taking the time to add value to people’s life, take the time to write engaging headlines! Keep using your voice to make a difference and remember to always…

Dream BIG,

Ryan

Question for comments below: Who is your favorite blogger? Why?

P.S. Have an idea for an article you would like me to write? Send me an email to ryan@averytoday.com! Thanks and if you enjoyed this article remember to share it with those you know on Facebook, Twitter or email by pressing one of the buttons below!

Jun 23

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Do You Want a Handwritten Letter?

By Ryan Avery Communication No Comments

During the World Record attempt a couple months ago I asked to write you handwritten letters so I could train to sign 5,000 signatures in one sitting.

You came to my aid and sent in your addresses and messages to request a handwritten letter all over the world. I sent more letters in two weeks than I can count! Over the past several weeks since then, the letters have arrived and you have shared with me when you got them and how much they meant by posting on Facebook, emailing me photos of you at your mailbox and even showing them to me in person when I see you. That really means a lot to me and I thought of continuing to write them!

I really enjoy writing those letters so much and hearing from each of you I thought I would do a project where I write one handwritten letter everyday in 2014. I might get more request than one a day, or might not, but I will write at least one letter a day, starting today, in 2014 and am asking for your help.

Do you want a handwritten letter? All you have to do is email me your mailing address at letters@ryanavery.com with a subject that says “I want a letter.” The first 30 people to send me an email at letters@ryanavery.com will be guaranteed to get a letter!

I think there is something special about going to your mailbox and seeing an envelop that has your name printed on it in human handwriting! This will be fun for me and hopefully it is a way I can give back in another way to say thank you for all you do for me!

I hope you are enjoying the start to your week and I look forward to receiving your emails. Remember to sign up for my blog in the top right hand corner of this page via email and continue receiving content focused on leadership, speaking and productivity every Monday and Thursday! As always…

Dream BIG,
Ryan

Question: Know someone who could use a letter? Share this article on your social media or via email and let the hand writing begin!

Jun 19

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9 Speaking Tips for Non-Native Speakers

By Ryan Avery Communication 6 Comments

According to the U. S. Census Bureau, there are more than 35 million adults in the United States who are non-native English speakers.

Many of these people are looking for work, to advance in their career and speak up and out for the causes they believe in. Non-native speakers can experience difficulties in developing and delivering their message when speaking to a group of people on stage, in a board room or during one-on-one conversations.

Non-native speakers might hear things like “I don’t understand what you are saying” or “Your accent is too thick” or “It’s hard to focus on what you are saying.” If you are are a non-native speaker who would like to improve the way your message gets translated into minds of those listening to you or you know someone struggling with their accent, here are nine tips you can use to improve the way you communicate:

Record yourself: Take the time to record what you are saying during your next speech or presentation. Then listen to it. Get a friend to listen to it. Identify the words that are hard to hear, understand or process. When you record yourself, you will pick up on things that you might not have noticed before.

Get a partner: Get someone to help you with your 2nd language who you trust. Someone who can call you out when you say a word wrong, aren’t pronouncing things correctly or using the right grammar. A partner can help you advance your communication skills by helping you see and hear the things you are not picking up on.

Be proud of your accent: Many of my non-native speaking clients say, “I need to get rid of my accent.” I think this is the wrong way to look at your voice. You should be proud of your voice and where you come from. You should’t get rid of your accent, you should embrace your accent. Keep the accent but make it so others can understand what you are saying. When you are proud, others will listen. This also will help you build confidence in what you are saying and remind yourself you speak two languages! Not many people can say that!

Be open to feedback: Listen. Listen. Listen. Ask around for feedback. When you are giving a speech or presenting a proposal at work, ask three or four of your colleagues to take notes and give you feedback on specifics you can improve on. Listen to what they say. Be open to asking for feedback anytime you are speaking to get better at communicating.

Find synonyms for words you can’t pronounce: There are words in English I have trouble pronouncing (I am no longer allowed to say prerequisite and familiarity in public). I avoid them at all cost. There are words some people cannot pronounce. You are not alone, just don’t use them! Find words that are similar to them and use those instead.

Speak slower: This is for all speakers and communicators. Slow down! Most of the time you are speaking too fast and it is distracting. It slurs your words together and on top of your accent it can be hard to digest what you are saying. Remember to pause, slow down and enunciate your words.

Practice one letter at a time: Find the letter that is the hardest for you to say (V or R or W or P). Practice just saying those letters over and over again. Pick words that have those letters in them and get your mouth comfortable with finding out how to properly say them without being distracting. Practice one letter at a time.

Find speakers you like: Find speakers who are speaking like you want to be speaking. Find speakers who might even have the same accent as you but are doing it the way you want to. What are they doing to get their message across or communicate in a way that people are focused more on their words than how they say them? Find speakers you like to feel more confident in knowing that if they can do it, so can you!

Practice everyday: Practice. Practice. Practice. Get good at practicing. Remember, how you practice is how you play so use these nine steps everyday to get better at speaking in your non-native language.

Please don’t think you ever need to get rid of your accent, you only need to focus on making sure you are speaking in a way that adds value, people understand what you are saying and enjoying your message. Keep using your voice to make a difference and as always…

Dream BIG,
Ryan

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Jun 18

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What E-Book would you most likely download?

By Ryan Avery Motivation 24 Comments

Looking to find out what you would most likely read if I offered one of the below tittles as a free download?

A Couple. Life Lessons. For Newlyweds.
How to create a solid foundation for a lasting relationship

6 Things Every Leader Needs To Succeed

What today’s leaders need more than anything

How to Launch Your Public Speaking Business
Your step by step guide in what it takes to make a career out of speaking

Please post your answer below and let me know why you choose that one. Thank you for reading my articles. I want to continue to provide you the best content and I hope they are helpful, entertaining and engaging! As always…

Dream BIG,
Ryan

Jun 05

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How Every Airline Should Handle a “Mistake”

By Ryan Avery Motivation 7 Comments

With more than 100 flights a year I get my fair share of “airport stories” and this one has a twist!

Chelsea and I were finishing up my book tour and headed on vacation with my parents. I am flying to Miami, she is flying to Panama City Beach so I wait by her gate because my plane is scheduled to leave an hour later than hers.

After 30-minutes of sitting, we get the announcement, “Ladies and gentleman, I have just been informed that Flight XYZ will be delayed due to a part that needs to be replaced on your airplane.”

Now usually this is where most airlines end their announcement with a “sorry for the inconvenience, please come up to the counter, wait in line and we will book anyone on another flight looking to still make their connections!”

Delta decided to handle it differently and this is how they made 200+ potential upset flyers… happy, satisfied and went above and beyond what they needed to do.

1st – They Effectively Communicated
From emails, to phone calls to messages and updates every 10 minutes, the Delta crew communicated what was happening and let their flyers know what they knew. As soon as we knew the flight was delayed I received an email saying how they could fix it. I received a phone call letting me know ways they could make it better and the crew said they were there to help with whoever needed assistance.

2nd – They Passed Out Food, Snacks and Drinks
Instead of saying sorry they showed they were sorry. They brought out first-class snacks for all passengers, drinks and even went one step further and ordered 15 pizzas for all passengers so they didn’t have to order food while they waited!

3rd – They Provided Options
They gave people options to communicate. You can download the Delta app, you can call one of 500 customer service representatives to reschedule your flight or you can talk to a gate agent at the counter. They gave options to communicate and respond in the way that was easiest for their customers.

It was great to see a global company taking initiative to communicate effectively with their customers, if all companies did this when a “mistake” occurred, their customers would be happier and their retention would be greater. Plus, not to mention, we live in a digital world and as I was looking around I noticed people posting their snacks on Instagram and Twitter.

So they made the conversation online go from frustrated to thankful and let their customers communicate how well they handle mistakes that arise. They might have spent $200 on this, but think of the customers they kept, the PR they received and the example they set! If all airlines, and companies, handled situations like this (communicated effectively and provide options) we as customers would be a lot happier! Thanks Delta for setting an example. As always…

Dream BIG,
Ryan

Question: What is your favorite airline story?

May 26

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The Best Part of Being American

By Ryan Avery Motivation 4 Comments

After spending last week in DC and on this Memorial Day I have been able to reflect on those who have given their lives, and those who dedicate their lives, to protecting our freedoms.

These men and woman are strangers whom I have never met, yet they have given their life to protect the values we all share. They are strangers yet because they are fellow Americans, they are also my neighbors, my family and my friends. They believe in the right to be free and for others who will live after them to have that same right.

Everyday I am thankful for being an American and being able to have the right to use my voice to make a difference and use my voice to say what I believe.

In my opinion, the best part of being an American is the First Amendment of our Bill of Rights!

Amendment I
Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.

There is no stronger statement in government history than this to me. It gives power to the people, it provides freedom to our citizens and allows everyone to have the right to live their life.

This might be the First Amendment but there can be certain social consequences to being a particular religion or speaking up about what you believe or petition the government! There are still things we need to do as Americans to advance this amendment.

I know it can be overwhelming to use your voice at times when others around you don’t agree with what you are saying but we must because, the results of using your voice can be scary, however silencing that voice can produce even scarier results.

Americans have died for us to have that right and we must honor them by using it. We must protect our First Amendment by using our voice and speaking up for things we believe in. That power in my opinion, is the best part of being an American. No matter your economical status, marital status, gender or race, we all have the power and right to use our voice!

This Memorial Day, reflect on the things you want to say, the things you want to accomplish and be reminded that strangers who believe in the power of freedom gave their life so you can have the freedom to say what you what, follow who you want and petition the very same government that set those laws into place over 200 years ago!

Thank you to every man and woman who has served our country. Thank you to every family who has given a child to the cause of protecting our freedom and thank you to everyone who uses their voice to make a difference in our country. I am forever grateful for your courage, sacrifice and American spirit. As always…

Dream BIG,
Ryan

Question: Do you agree with the First Amendment being the best part of being American? If not, what is your favorite Amendment to the US Constitution? (If you like this article and are thankful for those who have served our country, share this with your friends and family by clicking on one of the share buttons below!)

May 15

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How to stop talking and start communicating!

By Ryan Avery Motivation No Comments

I had the opportunity to have lunch with one of my new favorite authors,

He is a military man with a good heart and has dedicated his life to study the art of communication. His new book gives, “…counterintuitive strategies for learning how to interact productively and meaningfully in today’s digital world.” Something we all can improve on!

His book is filled with dozens of tips and insightful strategies and here are three ways you should stop talking and start communicating.

Lose your friends!
Tumlin explains that, “Important relationship are being trumped by people you barely know!” Just because you hit the “like” button does not mean you are connecting. Humans are social animals. We need to feel connected. Tumlin writes, “Today it is possible to accumulate scores of friends and still feel lonely, be connected to hundreds of people and feel like no one is listening and spend hours at work, sending and responding to countless messages, but still feeling unproductive.” It is because we are focused on technology and not people. “The problem with a more tech-centered view of communication is that it encourages us to expect too much from our device and too little from each other.” You should start communicating more on a human bases so you can build real relationships, feel connected to others and feel like your voice is actually being heard! If you are feeling disconnected from others, lose your “friends” online who don’t add meaning or value to your life and focus on those around you. Tumlin says, “The main reason to prioritize isn’t to squeeze people out of your life; it’s to make sure that the most important people stay in it.”

Stop talking
In my opinion, communication is the foundation to all of your success. To many people are talking rather than effectively communicating! Talking is you getting your voice heard. Communicating is having all parties who are part of the conversation understand what it is you are saying! The better you are at being able to effectively communicate what it is you want, the quicker you will be at receiving and reaching the goals you have for yourself, your company and your family. Think about a relationship you have built over time, that you lost one time due to one or two sentences? If you stop talking and start planning on ways to react to certain situations, you might be able to build better relationships and create lasting ones. Stop talking and don’t focus on what you want to say, focus on what you want to accomplish. The better communicator you are the better relationship you build and the better life you have.

Ignore your (telltale) heart
When communication problems arise, many of us just want to start talking instead of preparing what we want to say. According to ProFound, last year, productivity losses resulting from miscommunication costs companies $37 billion, or about $26,000 per employee per year, in the US and UK alone. We need to learn strategies and techniques that can help us improve our listening skills, ask the right questions to produce the right answers and minimize miscommunication across multiple communication channels like email, texting, face-to-face and social media. When we are able to effectively communicate to others, we improve productivity, we create clarity and we save money. All strategic communications (including the unexpected ones) benefit from preparation. Take time to think about what you want to say and how you want to say it to minimize conflict, confusion and miscommunication between those you are speaking to.

If you are looking or a book to read, pick up a copy of Stop Talking, Start Communicating and learn how to improve all areas of your life. Connect with Geoffrey and as always…

Dream BIG,
Ryan