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Mar 02

The Three-Question Humor Test

By Ryan Avery Motivation 3 Comments

How do you know if your humor is appropriate for your audience? Here is “a test” through which I run all of my laugh lines and stories. If the answer to all three questions is “Yes”, then I have a stronger chance that people will laugh and not be offended!

Will two generations understand it?

Will two cultures get it?

Would I say this in front of my grandma?

Now, some of you might have some pretty cool Grannies (I know I do) who won’t fault you for saying something interesting but inappropriate. If you do, you need to pick someone you hold to the highest standards!

For example, here is a two-minute video of how I used the three-question humor test to make sure I was going to make the audience laugh. I knew two generations would get it, two cultures would understand it, and I would say it in front of my grandma.

If you don’t know if two generations or cultures would get it, you need to ask people in that demographic. Share it with them. See if they understand it or if they might be offended by it. Always test it out!

Enjoy creating your laugh lines! Remember that humor is important because it helps people remember what you are saying, builds likability, and gets you rehired! As always…

Dream BIG,
Ryan

Feb 27

Love0

How To Quickly Build Trust With People You Don’t Know

By Ryan Avery Motivation 4 Comments

A friend recently asked, “Ryan, how do you quickly build trust with people you don’t know?” No solid relationship can survive without trust. The faster you build trust, the faster you can build your relationship.

Trust is good for business, marriage, and friendships. Here are five ways you can quickly build trust with people you don’t know:

Brene Brown It: It’s time to be more vulnerable. Don’t feel like you have to know all the answers, look good, feel good and be good all the time. We are human. Show and share your vulnerabilities with the other person. As Brene reminds us, we see being vulnerable as a weakness when we do it, but as courageous when someone else does it. Be more vulnerable.

Oprah Winfrey It: Stop talking and start asking more questions. Get the other person to open up and get to the point. Ask open-ended questions to elicit answers other than “yes”, “no”, and “maybe”. The more you can get someone else to open up and talk, the more comfortable you will make them feel. This will ultimately lead them to trust you sooner. Ask more questions!

JK Rowling It: Who has a better fail story then the Wizarding author herself? I love her story, and so do millions of people around the world! We love to see people succeed who struggled at one point in their life. The bigger the struggle, the more we care about them and applaud their success. Share your failures and struggles before your successes and see the window of trust widen!

Brendon Burchard It: Every time I watch something of Brendon’s I learn something. Every time! I remember the first thing I watched from him. He taught me something in the first five minutes. I thought, “Wow, this guy is amazing!” I bought his books, I follow him, and I can’t wait to attend one of his seminars. Teach them something right off the bat that will help improve their lives and they will trust you even more.

The more quickly you build trust with someone, the bigger opportunity you have to make a difference in this world! Work hard to build and maintain your trust with everyone around you! As always…

Dream BIG,
Ryan

Feb 25

Love0

The BIGGEST Problem Young Americans Face

By Ryan Avery Motivation 2 Comments

What is the biggest problem young Americans face today? It’s not war, diabetes, or too much time in front of the TV.

It is the abundance of opportunity.

We don’t lack opportunity in America; we lack the ability to know how to decide what’s the best opportunity for us and to feel secure that we picked the right one. There is too much to choose!

The feeling of wanting to do everything and not accomplishing anything is plaguing our generation. The curse of the Kardashians who have their own TV show, clothing line, music albums, millions in the bank, and access to the best parties in the world gives hope to many Millennials that they, too, can do the same.

I am not saying you can’t have everything one day. However, we are trying to have everything at the beginning. The Greats all focused and did one thing. They focused and accomplished one thing and became the best at it. From Steve Jobs to Lebron James, from Oprah to Ellen, they all focused and became the best in their industry. It led them to have anything and everything they wanted.

How do you pick one thing when you are offered and have the ability to do so many? This is a major problem because it causes lack of focus, depression, and does not produce the most innovative, creative or helpful products.

Americans don’t lack opportunity; they lack the focus and ability to decide what door of opportunity to walk through. Agree or disagree? What do you think is the biggest problem young American face? As always…

Dream BIG,

Ryan

Feb 20

Love0

A Plane Story: An HIV+ Veteran

By Ryan Avery Motivation 6 Comments

Because of my job, I fly a lot. I get the chance to sit next to some interesting people, and some not so interesting people.

Every time I fly, I am reminded what lessons I learn and stories I hear, so I thought I would start sharing them here.

Volume 1, Person 1 – The HIV+ Veteran

His dark-rimmed glasses, skinny arms, and haberdasher hat catch my attention as I get situated into my seat and prepare for a long ride to the opposite coast.

I am being a typical millennial with headphones in my ear, and I am not in the mood to talk to anyone so nothing is playing in them. This is a decoy I use when I am in public and am looking to be an introvert!

I smile, and say “Hi” to the man, and he does the same back. We take off, and I take out my headphones because my introverted side can only last so long. We start talking, and after about five minutes of sharing things about our lives, it feels as though we have been old friends for 20 years even though I could be his grandson.

I learn about his time in Vietnam, his worldly travels and how he has lived the past 30 years infected with HIV.

We open up and talk about things like death, sex, drugs, life-partners, and most everything you wouldn’t talk to a stranger about (or your in-laws), but for some reason it feels right. To tell you the truth, it was refreshing to talk with someone who has been through so much and has such a positive outlook on life.

Here is a man who lives with one of the most stigmatized infections in the world, who has fought to protect our country, who has lived in more countries that I can count, and who has spent more time working than I have been alive. It makes me think, “How many other fascinating people like him are out there whom I will never meet?”

All of these people I judge before I meet them; yet – once I get to know them – I realize how much I could learn from them and how much we have in common. These people have so much advice, history, and story inside of them. So much opportunity to learn from and remind yourself that we are all human.

It was one of the most refreshing flights I have had in the past five years! We land and say our goodbyes! We exchange contact info, disembark, and he hops into a wheel chair.

“I will see you around, kid!” he says. Although our lives, ages, and professions are vastly different I believe we will meet again!

What stories, lessons, and history are you missing out on by not getting to know the stranger next to you? Anytime you fly it is up to a flip of a coin who will be seated next to you. It could be a kook, a cook, or even a crook; but, the rare times you find a gem like Jeremy makes it worth it.

Reach out to your fellow neighbor and get their story. Who knows what you will learn, what will wake up inside you, and what stories you will hear! As always…

P.S. Do you like the idea of a recurring article series called “A Plane Story” in which I share my stories of those people I sit next to on a plane? If so, let me know in the comments below!

Feb 18

Love0

Five Reasons Your Business Should Be Telling More Stories

By Ryan Avery Motivation No Comments

Since the beginning of time people have shared stories to teach, preach and get their points across. Since the beginning of our lives parents, teachers and preachers have shared stories with us illustrating life’s greatest lessons.

So if we learn through stories, why shouldn’t businesses use them to promote and sell products, services, and ideas? They should, and here is why:

People buy stories: Customers are constantly consuming stories. From books to TV shows, from trips to cars, we buy things because of the story that is attached to it.

People share stories: Whether it is the company gossip in the breakroom, or the stories of what happened during the weekend while you are in the classroom, people share stories.

People remember stories: From little Red Riding Hood to Robin Hood, from Pretty Women to that embarrassing moment that happened to you in middle school – people remember the lessons they learned from the stories they heard and/or experienced.

People like stories: Good stories can make you feel good, can make you experience several emotions, and can bring a smile to your face. People are constantly looking for stories to entertain, educate, or inspire them.

People learn from stories: The major lessons in life you live by were all taught through stories. Whether it was from the Bible or the Koran, from Disney or Grimm’s Fairy Tales, we know the difference between right or wrong because of the heroes and villains with whom we are familiar.

So why are you not using stories in your business?

Why are you not wrapping a story around your product, service, and idea? If you want people to buy, share, remember, and like your product start sharing stories around what it is you sell and offer. Those leaders who

Happy storytelling, and as always…

Dream BIG,
Ryan

Feb 16

Love0

Giveaway for Post V-Day

By Ryan Avery Motivation 9 Comments

Ahh, V-Day! The day some couples love, and a day most single people dread!

A holiday institutionalized by Hallmark and chocolate companies everywhere. Instead of debating whether you like, love, or hate this day, why not participate in a fun giveaway?

GIVEAWAY: In the comments below, share about one thing you love (person, place or thing) and why you feel love towards it!

One lucky winner will receive a very, very special Post-Valentine’s Day giveaway that will include 75% off Valentine’s Day chocolate and a Starbucks gift card! I will post the winner in the comments below in 48 hours!

Hope you had a great V-Day! I am looking forward to reading your answers. As always…

Dream BIG,
Ryan

Feb 13

Love0

What Makes A Great Story?

By Ryan Avery Motivation No Comments

What makes a great story? If you are not familiar with the Hero’s Journey I would recommend you familiarizing yourself with it. Once you learn how to tell a great story, you can inspire, influence, and motivate people to take action.

As we know, people buy stories, share stories, like stories, and remember stories. So as a leader, why wouldn’t you want to be a good storyteller? Here are three things that make a great story:

A challenge: The harder you have to work to obtain your goal, the better the story you will have.

A fight: The stronger the contrast you can create between the person, idea or thing your “hero” is up against, the better story you will have.

A feeling: The more opportunities you give your audience to feel happy, sad, fearful, disgusted, surprised and angry, the more connected your audience will be to your story.

Think about all the great stories you have ever heard, watched, or read. All incorporate these three things. Start looking for them. Consider the world’s great stories and how those stories made you feel, what fight the heroes were up against, and what they tried to accomplish!

So the next time you are faced with an everyday challenge, fight or experience major feelings, know you are creating a solid life story for yourself! As always…

Dream BIG,
Ryan

Feb 11

Love0

Six Lessons Leaders Can Learn From Tiny Little Babies

By Ryan Avery Motivation One Comment

I had the chance to hang out with a few of my entrepreneur friends this weekend who happen to have the cutest babies I know! After spending the day with them, I realized we, as leaders, can learn a lot from these miniature humans!

1) Cry and get over it: Babies fall, they fail, and they make mistakes. They cry for a minute, and then they move on to the next thing. They don’t look back.

2) Be happy with the simple things: Babies have fancy toys, nice clothes, and fancy food! What do they play with that makes them the happiest? The boxes the toys came in. They have no care for fancy clothes other than what feels good to wear. They are happy, too, with a simple diet of milk and mushy food high in nutrients! Now, I am one who likes to wear nice clothes, and I prefer tasteful food; but, I can do a better job being happier with the simple things in life!

3) Tell people how you really feel: Babies don’t keep their emotions inside. When they are angry, they let you know. When you are happy, they let you know. When they like someone or don’t like them, they let the person know. They don’t care what people think of them. They care about letting others know what they think!

4) Be curious and try new things: Babies are constantly crawling to explore new territory and scanning for new things to touch! They are alive and happy to be alive, because there is so much out there to explore, see, taste, and touch!

5) Always be learning: Babies are digesting new things everyday! They are thirsty for knowledge.

6) Laugh often: No matter how much they cry, babies always laugh. They smile, they enjoy, and they experience happiness. They want to be happy and do what it takes. They say what they need to say in order to find that happiness.

Sure, babies scream on planes, make a mess, and deprive their parents of sleep; but, we as leaders can do many things to be more like tiny little babies! Move on! Be happy with the simple things, tell people how you feel, try new things, learn something new, and laugh often! Enjoy the day, and as always…

Dream BIG,
Ryan

P.s. Thank you Jessica and Devin for letting me use your little one for this post! Y’all are awesome!

Feb 09

Love0

Do You Have a Loser or a Winner Mindset?

By Ryan Avery Motivation, Uncategorized One Comment

After my last article, I thought I would share some insight on what losers say versus what winners say on various subjects and to see where we land on the loser versus winner mindset scale!

Dreams and Goals

Losers Say: “I have goals. I have them in my head. I don’t share them with anyone because it’s not their business. I think about them every so often, and I am pretty sure I will make them happen this year!”

Winners Say: “I have goals. I have written them down and have shared them with my family and friends to hold me accountable. I look at them everyday! They are clear, obtainable, and I believe I can and will accomplish them.”

Money

Losers Say: “If I had X amount of dollars, my life would be so different!”

Winners Say: “I am going find a way to earn X amount of dollars so I can change my life, give more, and do more for myself, my family and my friends!”

Love

Losers Say: “I wish someone would love me!”

Winners Say: “I can’t find love until I love myself.”

Happiness

Losers Say: “I just want to be happy!”

Winners Say: “What are the things that already make me happy, and what can I do starting today to be happier on a regular basis?”

Family and Friends

Losers Say: “My friends and family take up so much time. They always annoy me. They seem to cause more pain than good.”

Winners Say: “I love my family. I take care of my family. We communicate on a regular basis to avoid misunderstandings.”

Profession

Losers Say: “Ugh, I hate my job!”

Winners Say: “I will do what it takes to get the job of my dreams! I deserve to love what I do!”

Health

Losers Say: “We all die, sometime!”

Winners Say: “The healthier I am, the more I can do!”

So, do you have a loser mindset or a winner mindset? What are the things you need to start telling yourself to gain that championship mindset? As always…

Dream BIG,
Ryan

Feb 06

Love0

What is a Todayer?

By Ryan Avery Communication, Leadership, Motivation 3 Comments

The reason I started this blog was to motivate and inspire people to take action on their big goals. I believe we all have the opportunity to add value to this world, and the bigger we dream, the more value we add.

I see my friends, family and community go through the motions of life rather than utilizing their potential and giving their gifts to the world. It’s been said, “The biggest obstacle keeping you from becoming the greatest, is you settling for being good at what you do!”

Just like a car needs gasoline, humans need motivation to move. The farther you plan to go the more you need! My articles, videos, speeches, and life are dedicated to motivating you toward accomplishing your goals and helping you make things happen.

This blog is for those who want to take advantage of today, plan for tomorrow, and to achieve their BIG dreams. I write, speak, and share stories to motivate you to pursue your goals while being open and honest as I strive to attain mine.

So where does the term “Todayer” come into play?

I want to build a like-minded community of people who think, “I am sick of being average, and I am ready to be the best!” I looked at those who were accomplishing big things and I found that each one of them

Takes advantage of what he or she has right now
Plans for the future
Has a positive attitude
Takes action
Gives back

So, for me a Todayer is someone who takes advantage of today, plans for tomorrow, and actively goes after BIG dreams!

We learn as we go, we support each other while we are on our way, and we make things happen. Do we mess up? Yes! Do we give up! No! We take advantage of what we are given and use it to help others, build up those around us, and make an impact.

After seeing this quote, “The goal is not to live forever, the goal is to create something that will!” on an old journal I thought… I want to build a community around people who want more motivation, want to make a difference in this world, and want to go after their big dreams… no matter how crazy, outlandish, and far-fetched the dream seems!

I hope you will join us. Read, share, and comment on articles and videos you see here. I am here for you. I am here to offer motivational stories, strategies, and insights of real value to you.

You will see a lot more of the word “Todayers” on this blog. My hope is to one day see the word spread and have a community full of those who take advantage of today, plan for tomorrow, and go after their BIG dreams!” As always…

Dream BIG,
Ryan

* Subscribe to this blog via email at the top right hand corner of this article if you feel you would like to join us in being a Todayer!

Feb 01

Love0

15 Best and Worst Super Bowl Commercials 2015

By Ryan Avery Motivation 3 Comments

Which were the best and worst Super Bowl commercials this year? Some watch the BIG Game to show support for their team, or to bet BIG money on the game, or to indulge their passion for football! But if you are like me, I switch between watching the Puppy Bowl and watching the BIG Game because of the commercials.

This year we had ones that made us laugh, cry, cringe, think, and feel! What do you think topped the cake for the best and worst Super Bowl commercial in 2015?

Here are the 15 best and worst Super Bowl commercials of 2015 in my opinion: